Stags, injuries and mix ups aplenty resulted in La Chiesa forfeiting the points
on offer in the match against Ashton Park this weekend.
The fixture had long been a thorn in the side for Chiesa gaffer Samuel Knowles. Alan Lamont's Stag
Weekend in Tallinn may have presented two dozen or so Essex Boys with a chance to expose themselves to Eastern European
cuisine, culture and architecture, but it robbed Hornchurch's number one football team of half of their squad - Danny Trew,
The Hardwick brothers, Danny Button and Cy Taylor accompanying the prospective groom to Estonia's Capital for the weekend.
Knowles had tried to rearrange the fixture for the previous Sunday, but Ashton would have had half of their team missing,
and the 25th April was a non runner as neither team could find a pitch.
Nevertheless, the Hornchurch Rossineri have coped with the absence of key players on several occasions
this season, and Knowles, himself unavailable as he was starting an implausibly lengthy thirty five day ban for two minor
infringements against Astra back in February, was confident he could muster a starting XI worthy of the famous red and black shirt. Surely
the outrageously large number of players signed up earlier in the season would be enough to cover the loss..... then
Terry Soteriou announced he was away at a Christening all weekend.... Adam Jeffers was in Portugal... Jonny Gray revealed
he hadn't recovered from his mysterious rib injuries... Pete Sandhu was serving a ban for a red card recieved playing for
his Saturday team... No worries thought Knowles, LC/DC still have enough in reserve to be considered favourites for this
mid table clash in the Essex Sunday Corinthian League.
On Saturday night, dramatic news filtered down the phone lines in Upminster... Key players Colin Williams
and John Riley had been misinformed that the game was off and were unable to make the meet - rumours that rivals
Woodford Hammers were behind these hoax calls were unfounded, but disaster had struck! The Gillham boys had been seen
in a seedy flat in Beckton a little worse for wear - the engine room of the team was not going to be firing on all cylinders!
An uncomfortable night of tossing and turning for Knowles, but yet more players were found, Chiesa were going to constitute
the fixture!
The writing was on the wall though when Knowles awoke half an hour late for his lift with fourteen
missed calls from an anxious Mark Harris on his phone. It dawned on the sleepy Chiesa boss that although they had sufficient
players, well nine including the legendary Antonio Ringer, the absentees had kept their shirts and the LC/DC didn't have
enough to go round. Iain Gay's non appearance at The Chequers was the final straw, the game could not go on and the phone
call had to be made to cancel.
Ashton were not happy, having already arrived at the ground. Fair enough, they have three points and
our sincere apologies for a Saturday Night / Sunday Morning wasted. Vital breathing space in the race for fifth place between
La Chiesa and the Hammers has been lost as a result of this debacle - they stuck eight past Bryant, and it is no longer
in Chiesa's hands whether they finish in the top half of the table. No game next Sunday morning for La Chiesa; the
boys are off to Romford's new shopping centre / cinema complex instead to try and arrange some kind of a piss
up apparently...
